Children love it when their parents are consistent as it makes it easier for them to predict their behavior. This puts the kids in control of their own behavior and the repercussions it has on them.
Here are consistencies your kids need at home
Being a consistent parent means doing as we said we would do for a specific action of our children. Resisting giving children second or third chances for poor behavior or breaking the rules is a part of consistent parental behavior.
This has several positive aspects because we never come down very hard on the kids once several subsequent chances are misused by them as they are penalized at every point of a rule break.
Acting early and preventing poor behavior from children in the first place consistently is the ideal approach for effective parenting.
Setting up a Daily Routine
In order for the rest of the day to go smoothly, it is essential to have a comprehensive plan in place for your children. It should start in the morning and can include mapping out the activities and of your kid throughout the day.
For example, there might be strict rules in place about the time of getting out of bed, about not switching on the TV before breakfast and others that the kid needs to follow to a tee.
Apart from the rules, the plan should also include rewards for children. For example, a hug every morning or goodnight kisses.
A Timetable for Meals
Apart from the exact time of having their meals, it also mentions proper table manners and a palate for a balanced diet. This makes sure that they are prepared to dine anywhere once they grow up and that they get proper nutrition.
Having a timetable also makes sure that your kid does not miss out on any of his or her meals for the day.
Apart from making this timetable, it is also extremely important to make children eat at the table instead of anywhere they like in the house. Growing up, they will learn to stay at the table and eat alongside other members of the family.
Bedtime Practices
Putting the kids to sleep can be a tedious job for most parents. A consistent plan of action needs to be developed for this purpose to ensure a healthy sleeping routine for both the parents as well as the kids.
A rule of thumb for the three primary things to ensure before putting the kids to bed can be “Brush, Water, and Potty”. Kids often tend to skip these and in order to make them used to the schedule, this consistency needs to be maintained throughout their childhood.
Proper Disciplinary Actions
This aspect is especially relevant if you have multiple kids. As a parent, it is extremely important for you to make sure that the punishment is fitting to the mischief that has been committed. Meting out unfair treatment to the children can often lead to disheartenment in the long run.
Therefore, in order to guarantee a happy and healthy relationship with your kids, make sure that your actions are consistent in response to the mistakes made by your kids.
It will also help them to maintain discipline and know exactly what and where their mistakes were so that they can avoid them in the future.
Daily Household Chores
It is essential for kids to learn about their responsibilities in the household from a young age. Making them aware of their chores in the house will go a long way to bring up a hardworking and responsible human being.
Having a consistent attitude for the parents in this respect is also mandatory.
Kids need to be made aware exactly of the chores they are expected to perform in the household and the consequences of failing to do them. As mentioned earlier, these are disciplinary actions that need to be consistent for every member for the same actions.
Building a Snack Time Structure
It is quite common for most kids to ask for a snack throughout the day. However, this basic characteristic of children can be used to their benefit. As parents, you can build a snack time structure for the entire day.
Snacks will be given to them only during these specific times. This will help children take responsibility and ownership for their requests.
Instead of pestering you the whole day, they will ask for a snack at these specific times only. This will also make them understand the importance of the different periods of the day better and have a positive impact on their health which could have been hampered with inconsistent snacking routines.
Technology Limits
Kids nowadays are no more fascinated by simple toys or fairy tales. They are more interested in sophisticated gadgets like computers, smartphones, and tablets. However, spending long hours on these will have negative impacts on their health and character in the long run.
Therefore, parents should make conscious efforts to limit the amount of time the child spends on these gadgets. Setting daily limits for your children will not only prevent the harm caused by excessive interaction with technology but will also make them responsible. They will not demand an iPad beyond the mentioned time.
Time with Family
In this fast-paced world, most of us have to make conscious efforts in order to take out time from our busy schedules for our families. There is no reason why our children’s lives should be any different.
Just like as parents we have a dedicated time for our families, our kids should learn the same thing from us.
To make them learn in the best way possible, it is essential for us to be consistent with our family time.
For example, going out on Friday nights or having a picnic on Sundays will go a long way in developing the character of your little one so that he becomes a great family man one day.
Women
It is true that children learn most things are from us. Therefore, if we want to make a gentleman out of them, we will have to be a gentleman first. Hence, disrespecting their mother in any way is not acceptable.
There has to be mutual respect between their parents consistently throughout their life.
They will see us and learn to respect the women in their life including their mothers. Even the other women of the household including the domestic help, grandparents, or anyone else must be equally respected and must not be looked down upon by any means.
Consistent Attitude
As mentioned earlier, children learn from their parents. If the mother and father display a strong and responsible attitude consistently, it has an impact on the character of the child as well.
Often, difficult situations require strong responses on our part as parents.
We need to tread with caution during these times as they are critical for the upbringing of our children as whatever they see in us, will replicate. Thus, developing a consistent character is essential for all parents.
Having a proper schedule at home
As adults, we have some resources including schedules and planners to assist us in preparing for the next few days. We have experienced this organization over time. It can be essential to fulfill the tasks we need to do and helps us to be successful adults.
Do we not start to instill something in our children at an early stage?
As a homestay, we must have a day plan. It would allow us to concentrate on what we had to do. We get to the end of the day so much that we look back and ask, “What have we been doing all day?”
The time was past, so we didn’t realize if we were productive. The creation of a timetable for all of us put people on track to do stuff and made children independent.
Make them aware of time
Schedules of time links help children understand the time and time they need to talk about. Through using the watch, your child can now read the shown time. Your child will begin to grasp the A.M. and P.M. principle.
Makes your child predictable
Doing predictably builds the trust of a baby in adults. When adults answer each time an infant screams, he knows that the adult will attend to his needs. In the event of a hungry, tired, or playful mood, children should be guaranteed protection to satisfy their needs.
An older child may wait longer to meet its needs, but it is not expected that a hungry child will wait for a certain time for new food.
Indeed, a starving baby who is constantly forced to wait until her food discovers that adults cannot be trusted to satisfy their basic needs.
How does consistency benefit children?
The children have to internalize, rehearse and replicate the learning process. Similar to learning 2+2=4, children will have to integrate, replicate and practice behaviors. When parents respond and have consequences, children know what to expect.
Your child will foresee how you are going to react to particular circumstances, like throwing food or when the time is right.
This does not mean your kids can not press or check to see how your reaction improves. But, with time, the continuity will make your child feel healthy. Children are consistent with seeing the universe.
Why is it hard for parents to remain consistent?
It’s tiring and irritating to parents. We manage to get through the day a lot of the time. Accuracy prevails over continuity for many parents. You may be very upset with your child’s not cleaning up their bed, so you are fed up and do it yourself after being asked many times.
Being born as humans, we make mistakes, so it is important to ensure that children are confident and safe.
Choosing continuity expediency affects the actions and character of your infant. It takes time and maturity to be consistent, however, it is an investment in your child’s success and can strengthen your bond as your child develops.
How can one adhere to a consistent routine?
–One of the first things you should do for yourself and your child is to consider what your timetable is and what you and your child expect during this period. It’s your responsibility to tell your children what they want.
–A sleepless night can make your entire day go to waste. Many people have sleeping patterns that started with their young children. However, children who ask for a drink, a cookie, a hair-washing, or some imaginative item they believe will keep the night going can very easily derail these rituals. The same thing happens before school in the morning.
–Be sure everybody in the family knows what you want from them to keep the habits running. You should dress them up or brush their teeth on their own, depending on the children’s age. When children know how to do their duties, they are encouraged to respond favorably to the assignment.
–Set up a schedule and do everything you can to adhere to it. When the schedule has changed greatly, share it with your child so that they can organize themselves emotionally and do not get worried or shocked. Above all, don’t let the routine hijack your kids. Being calm and persistent tells your child to be a safe person when life is messy for you.
The reason why a consistent caregiver is necessary for your child
Any parents believe it’s a smart idea to frequently change child care services. But in the family as well as in kids, your child has healthy, favorable, and predictable relationships. Changing childcare services all too much is disruptive and a new partnership with and new caregiver needs to be established.
Any parents fear that if they are attached to a childcare provider, their child will enjoy them less. It’s wrong. With a soft, lovely caregiver, your child helps create confidence and stability.
The reason why excessive control can hamper your child’s behavior and consistency
Consistency is essential for the brain to develop, but life cannot always be predicted. Often, as unforeseen occurs, the rituals and laws of your child will change. Having a consistent and reliable schedule helps create a sense of safety for your child and helps it to adapt as circumstances differ.
The firm conviction that nobody can alter or attempt to influence what affects your child in the world of your child can raise family tension and irritate and cause anxieties in your child.
Tips to be more consistent
Do one thing at a time
When trying new parenting technologies, one of the no-fail rules is to pick only one behavior. Enabling coaches of parents to chat all the time to parents who “bit” and “feel very upset, confused and stressed out.”
You are unable to be optimistic as you want to address all the behavioral problems that you experience with your child at once.
Thus, to start with cheating, sweating, homework completion, or bedtime, choose a particularly high-priority question. Once the limitations of this one environment are more consistent, you can connect and start working on another.
Always be positive
Tell yourself kindly and what you wish to see happen. What would you like to learn from your child? Ask yourself what’s going to happen if you let your actions slip ‘just once’ instead of breathing hard and doing just what you know you have to do.
Think of your long-term vision and what could happen in time if the problem you have taken is not consistent.
Being self-conscious means two things. First, take a rest or take a break anytime you feel stressed. If your child begs, argues, fights, or complains in your presence, give yourself time to answer. You cannot yet reply to them and go out, let your kid know. Take a while to relax and dream about what you want next.
Often, whether you are tired or stressed, find room for you every day for at least 15 minutes to help you lower your stress level. To take care of yourself means, too, to ask others for help.
You should speak to your partner and subtly remember that you are reliable. This can also include approaching someone in your neighborhood to chat about what is happening — someone who can assist you in managing parental stress and expectations more effectively.
In either way, it is a way of being an approved adult to take care of yourself. You do not relinquish the burden your child places on you—and that you must not do it alone.
Frequently Asked Questions on Consistent Parenting
Yes, as a parent, it is extremely important that you are consistent in your behavior in front of your kids. Especially while dealing with them. This will go a long way in helping in his/her upbringing as a responsible person.
Children love it when their parents are consistent. They can gauge their responses to various activities beforehand and decide accordingly. It makes them take responsibility for their actions. Also, once they are denied undue favors consistently, they learn self-restraint.
It is absolutely natural for a parent to find it difficult to resist giving in to the demands of the kid. But you should learn to be strong and display consistent behavior while dealing with your child to make him learn self-restraint and responsibility.
Contradictory opinions between parents are quite common. However, to maintain consistency of opinions in front of the kids, it is suggested to have a prior discussion on matters and reach a middle ground. In essence, the child should witness the difference in opinions.
It is difficult to suggest exact measures. However, simple methods like keeping tabs on decisions, making sticky notes as reminders, and having prior discussions with your spouse might go a long way in maintaining consistent parenting behavior.
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Mother of Two children. I’m a former teacher with a background in child development and a passion for Good parenting. I understand child development and know how to develop activities to help children learn and grow. Spare time, I enjoy spending time with my family, reading, and volunteering in my community.