‘Having a child’ is important but also a very difficult decision. One might think that after having the first child, the decision of whether or not to have another child becomes easy. But it’s not all true. A parent faces the same level of dilemma and confusion at the time of the third child.
Is it a good idea to have a third child?
- Having a third child is not a problem if you are ready.
- If you have no problems with finances, a third child is a great idea.
- Have a third child only if your other two kids are ready to accept a sibling.
- If you have any health complications, consult your doctor first before deciding to get pregnant.
Given below is a list of the pros and cons of a third child, which will help you make a better decision.
Pros of a third child
Here are all the pros associated with having a third child.
- It is genuinely satisfying
You might not agree with the above statement in the initial years after giving birth. But as your kid grows older you realize that your decision of having a third child was one of the best decisions that you ever made. You then can never imagine your life without him/her.
- Bringing an extra source of love to your world
You know that you are going to bring a new life into your world that you are going to love unconditionally and get loved back the same way. Not only you but also your other two children will now have one more soul to love and to love them back.
- Chance to live the moments that you missed with the other children.
Juggling between work and children makes you miss precious little moments in your growing child’s life- like their first words, first crawl, first giggle. You thought of having those moments with your second child but you missed them again. Well, the third child brings back the opportunity to live those precious moments.
- The guilt is reduced significantly when it is the third child that you are raising.
Raising your second child would have made you feel guilty in many instances. Especially at the time when you are not able to pay much attention to your first kid. But this time it will be different. Because now the first two have each other to take care of when you are busy with your newborn.
- Now your home has a few more years to add the memories with a kid in the house
As the kids grow, you are aware of the truth that one day they are going to leave your home to make their own life and your home will be left with only you and your partner. Now that you are having a third child, ‘the day’ is postponed for a few years. Now your home has a few more years to add to the memories.
- From duo to a gang- the sibling bond gets stronger and better
Your other two children now have a new friend to play with, a new partner to enact innocent pranks and a new member to outvote your ‘not so fun’ ideas. They will always be looking after each other. Your kids can now do things that were just not suitable for two, like- playing a board game, jamming with drums, and piano. In the end, you will see that it is not just you but also your kids who think that three is much better than two.
- The other two children, learning to take care of themselves
Children understand when their parents have too much on their plate, especially when there is a newborn in the house. They start to take care of themselves, like making their own cereal, tidying up their room, getting ready for school without any hassle.
- I am a super parent
You have a lot of experience in raising the two children. The third one now will make you feel like riding a bicycle down a hill on a smooth road. This will boost your confidence and increase your morale. You will feel like a super parent.
Cons of a third child
Listed below are the cons of having a third child.
- Reliving the sleepless nights
As a parent, you know that it is not easy to take care of a newborn, especially in the first two years. The sleepless nights, the feeling of exhaustion all day. You have to relive these difficult times all over again.
- Going through the body changes again
From pregnancy to a couple of years after the child is born, your body goes through a lot of change. You know that some of these changes are not comforting and you have to go through them again.
- Managing time becomes more difficult
With two children, it would not have been very easy for you to spare time for yourself and your partner. Now with a third child managing time is going to be a more difficult task. You may have to make some compromises.
- Increase in expenses
Raising a child is very expensive, you are aware of that. You might have to make compromises with your current lifestyle. You have to look for more income which can be stressful.
- More chores to attend to
The amount of chores that you have to do now is going to increase significantly when the third child comes along. You’ll have more plates to clean, more clothes to wash, more errands to run.
- The criticism you don’t want to hear
This may sound absurd, but it is true. Though you may have friends and family who will be happy about your third child, you will also come across people who will criticize you for it- telling you to put a full stop.
Should you have a third child? The answer lies within you. Ask this to yourself. Having a third child is a big decision, take your time. Don’t haste into it. In the end, whatever your decision is, you know it is the right one. Consider every pro and con, and you will definitely make the right decision for yourself and your family.
Frequently Asked Questions
Here are a few important questions that are normally asked by parents who are interested in conceiving for the third time.
What are the possibilities of having a twin?
Twin babies are not very common. According to the statistics, the probability of having a twin baby is 1 in 250 pregnancies.
Does the government provide extra benefits for the third child?
Yes, the government some tax benefits for the additional child. Please consult an expert for more details.
Can I consult an outsider for this decision?
You can seek suggestions from anybody.
What changes am I going to go through after my third pregnancy? Is it going to be any different from my previous pregnancies?
Body changes also depend on the environment you are in right now. Consult an expert for more details.
What if my third child is from a different father?
It is perfectly normal. Your child will always be yours and love you unconditionally.
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Mother of Two children. I’m a former teacher with a background in child development and a passion for Good parenting. I understand child development and know how to develop activities to help children learn and grow. Spare time, I enjoy spending time with my family, reading, and volunteering in my community.