Children are very curious by nature, let’s take the example of infants who go around crawling to pick up any object they find and put it inside their mouth. Why do they do it? Experimenting and curious to know what it actually tasted like! The same theory applies to sex education.
Parents sit back simply putting all the burden on the school, teachers, and the institution. There is another lot who thinks it’s a taboo so they simply minus the topic from their lives.
Why do parents need to discuss sex education with their kids?
- Help them to get rid of sexual diseases
- Friendly atmosphere
- Children will be saved from depression
- Healthy sexual development
- Improves interpersonal relationships
- The right use of media and research on the topic
- Track on sexual abuse especially younger children.
- Learns about contraception and reproduction
How to introduce sex education to children?
Children get curious day by day and obviously they want to eat the forbidden fruit someday. It is the responsibility of parents to speak to their children about sex, sexual diseases, sexual desires, and stress on a casual conversation on the topic without making it special.
There should be a continuous discussion on the subject especially when the child turns an adolescent. Parents need to follow a cool body language and discuss the topic with additional listening skills.
Teach them the difference between sex (gender) and Sex
Educate your child that sex defines gender difference and Sex actually means a broader term. Give an honest explanation and keep your body language calm and casual just the way you discuss other topics.
Be a great listener
It’s always advisable to have your two ears open than your mouth. Children should have those ears where they can spill their secrets and get the right advice. Always listen to them first and then give your golden advice.
Let them feel valued and respected for the feelings they are witnessing. You need to understand teenage curiosity on sex and give good appropriate advice rather than pouncing on them with your judgment. Make sure you know about parenting tips during the pandemic.
Maintain eye contact
Your body language plays a very important role while approaching your children with sex education. Don’t make yourself feel guilty. You cannot expect a blatant topic on sex at the dinner table. Create the right atmosphere, take a movie scene, and ask a generic hypothetical question.
It could be an open-ended question, and your child’s take on it would make you understand his state of understanding on the topic. But you need to be calm and confident in your discussion and don’t lull away from maintaining right body posture.
Avoid the word ‘Don’t’
Parents often threaten children with harsh phrases like Don’t have sex, Don’t get yourself pregnant, Don’t talk about premarital sex, Don’t get into a live-in relationship.
The outcome is that children will do just the opposite of what you say. It’s not good to be judgmental when the topic is sensitive. You need to be approachable, and respect their feelings as you went through the same phase.
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Keep your sex education factual for young children
Young children need to know what is bad touch and good touch. Before that, they need to know the names of all the organs.
This will always keep you informed on sexual abuse and violation. They will tell you exactly when someone makes then feel uncomfortable. Teenagers learn about sex from porn, online sites, peer groups, and the media.
It is very natural for them to feel attracted to the opposite sex or same-sex. You need to make them understand the value of having sex with mutual consent.
Teach your child to respect a woman
Children should not view women as the submissive better half and an object of pleasure. It’s good to instill the value of love and respect towards a woman who nurtures and harbors happiness.
If they respect women, they will never violate the limitations of keeping the woman’s sanctity.
You should know how much to say
You should keep the age factor in mind and decide on how much to say. If a young child asks you about menstruation or childbirth, you just cannot go on explaining him in detail, which goes beyond their level of understanding.
As they grow, add on a few more depending on their maturity. Make it informative, so that they can clarify their doubts.
Keep your values strong
Your child need not follow the set of rule that you made in your life. You can share your experiences, but always remember that your priority to shoot the topic is safety. You should be honest to answer their queries related to sex or else they seek answers from a different source.
Don’t ask them to implicate what you believe in, but at least be transparent on your own values. Teaching them will help in making them mentally strong.
Discuss difficult words
There are words like STD, abortion, contraception, masturbation, and depression. Let them know that the outcome of premarital sex might result in something dangerous. Though a teenager would do what he wants to, yet you can positively discuss the consequences of crossing the line.
Speak to your child frankly on the topic before their puberty
It’s not just girls, but even boys get curious about menstruation. Both boys and girls have the right to know the cycle and the importance of having consistency. Girls will know when to be alarmed, and boys would understand the pain of a stained frock.
Before puberty, you need to speak to them on the topic and educate on the consequences of having too much interest.
Frequently asked questions (FAQs) on Sex Education and Parenting
1. How appropriate is it to give nicknames to private parts?
Young children often call out sexual organs with different names. But this lingo will make then realize that the real words are taboo. Let them use the actual words.
2. Is it good for parents to share their own personal sexual experiences?
This greatly depends on different families and the way they view certain approaches. As a parent, keep a few things private a let your child know that privacy is not keeping a guilty secret but just a secret to let it remain special.
3. How far can a parent explain if a child asks about oral sex?
You need to explain the difference between lovemaking and raw sex. Educate your child on intimacy that comes out with love and porn which comes out with violence and unnatural. Speak to them honestly about the consequences of oral sex rather than the guidelines of doing it.
Verdict
Sex Education is crucial in this generation. Due to the growing dependency on social media and online sites, children get hooked over a topic on sex. It’s good for a child to know the importance of Consent and Sex, but consent does not always mean submissive. Sex Education is a continuous process that needs to be discussed time and again go avoid your child falling prey to vulgarism and nudity.
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Mother of Two children. I’m a former teacher with a background in child development and a passion for Good parenting. I understand child development and know how to develop activities to help children learn and grow. Spare time, I enjoy spending time with my family, reading, and volunteering in my community.
